The Beauty of: Long Distance Relationships

Welcome to “The Beauty of”, our series where we discuss different types of relationships, weddings, and lifestyles and shed some light on topics not commonly discussed! Do you have an idea for this series? Let us know at hello@golijune.com!

As much as there’s this common conception that ‘long distance never works’, the stats show that 7 million couples around the world are currently in one! Typically school, work, and military service can keep couples apart. However in this day and age, individuals can meet people across the globe at the click of a button! And what’s to keep those who are compatible apart? Today we’re discussing the beauty of being in a long distance relationship, and some benefits the relationship may have as a result!

 

1. They can actually work!

The statistics speak for themselves: 7 million couples in LDR’s with about a 40% success rate. Speaking from experience, I feel that long distance relationships can only succeed if there is trust, and each person feels confident in the choice that they’ve made. You need to be confident in knowing your love for the other is strong, that you’ve made the best choice for yourself, and you in fact don’t need to know ‘what else is out there’ (out there being the city you’re in). This being said: LDR’s are not easy, but not impossible. A long distance relationship builds a strong foundation of trust and communication and fosters a solid connection for when your paths are able to come together.

  

2. Strengthening Communication

Anyone who’s been in a long distance relationship long term will know that at times it can feel like you’ve got nothing to talk about. You can only ask someone how their day was so many times. Those that have made it through this initial lull can tell you that it probably actually strengthened the bond with their partner and facilitated the communication far better than they expected. Putting the effort in to have meaningful conversations with your partner means remembering key events they have coming up so you can ask them about it specifically, and thinking deeper about your day-to-day activities. So, the next time they ask you “how was your day?”, you might say something more than just ‘fine’. Keeping a person an active member of your life and filling them in on important details is crucial to maintaining a supportive, healthy relationship.  

3. Understanding Yourself & Maintaining Independence

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Now, there is the possibility of two people in an LDR talking too much (I know, but it can happen). With technology bringing every corner of the globe together, its now easy to Skype, snap, text, email, Facetime, Instagram message, and Facebook message your partner. And just because you can doesn’t mean you should. The space of long distance allows you to pursue your own interests and spend your time the way you like! Take advantage of this period in your relationship because eventually it will change. Create an understanding with your partner that you don’t need to rush home at 8pm every night to Facetime and keep them up-to-date with what you’re up to so they can still feel included as part of your life!

 

Maintaining independence is critical in any relationship, but is often forgotten as a benefit to a long distance relationship. You can not only cultivate a strong relationship with your partner, but you have the time and the space to focus on yourself and your own goals.

 

4. Appreciating your Partner

Long distance couples often don’t see each other anywhere from a few weeks to a few months at a time, and nothing makes the heart grow fonder than absence! Spending time away and coming together again makes for hundreds of little holidays to look forward to. It facilitates gratitude and appreciation for the time you get to spend with each other, and you don’t even need to be doing anything special! In most typical relationships, they have to schedule in ‘me time’, whereas you have been counting down until ‘we time’. You are lead to appreciate your person more and more, especially for all their little quirks. Every reunion is epic and brings you one step closer to closing the gap.

 

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5.  You can write your own rules  

 Just as with any relationship, it is between two people. There are no hard and fast rules, or a recipe on how to make a LDR work. It may make sense for you as a couple to talk on the phone in the morning and at night, or it may not. What may work is to text throughout the day, or send each other snap updates. Whatever works for you as a couple, commit to it together and don’t be afraid to check in if something stops working. I know for myself, time changes can throw off usual phone call times because we have such a large time difference. But we make it work and who’s to say we’re wrong? I know some people may be concerned that we don’t speak on the phone every day, but as a couple we don’t necessarily need that as a rule to know that we’ve got the other person in our corner.  Write your own rules, make it work, be your own (long distance) relationship goals!